When it comes to supporting autistic children, a one-size-fits-all approach simply doesn’t work. The Parental Stress Centre’s "SUPER" framework is a holistic approach that supports and upskills Autistic children to navigate through their lives while also addressing the importance of the child’s environment, culture and relationships as additional solutions to key challenges Autistic children face in their life.
The SUPER framework focuses on five key areas: Self-awareness, Understanding, Prepare/Plan/Teach, Environment/Culture, and Relationships & Rapport. Let’s break it down.
S - Self-Awareness Supporting an autistic child starts with self-awareness—yours, not theirs. Take a moment to reflect on your mindset, biases, and emotional triggers. How are you thinking about these challenging situations? Do you have preconceived beliefs from your own life or childhood about what "success" should look like? Do your thought processes need to be more flexible or child-centred? By understanding your reactions, you can approach challenges with empathy and patience, creating a safer space for the child.
Self-awareness also includes recognising when your emotions may be influencing the way you respond. If you’re feeling frustrated or overwhelmed, it’s important to take a moment to regulate yourself before addressing a child’s behaviour. Children, especially autistic ones, are incredibly attuned to the emotional states of those around them. Your calm and self-aware presence can make a significant difference to your relationship with the child and their emotional regulation capabilities.
U - Understanding means learning about autism through a strengths-based lens. Instead of focusing on "deficits," recognise the child’s unique abilities and how they process the world. This might involve educating yourself about sensory sensitivities, communication styles, or how executive functioning challenges impact daily life for your child. The goal is to meet the child where they are, rather than forcing them to fit into a neurotypical mold.
Take time to learn from Autistic adults and advocates who share their experiences. They can offer invaluable insights into the Autistic perspective, which can deepen your understanding and improve your ability to support the child.
Understanding is also about getting curious about why a behaviour may exist within the child. What must they be thinking to be feeling or behaving this way? Are there any patterns in their repetitive behaviours or what they say that give you clues as to why their behaviour makes sense? When you get to the heart of the problem, it either becomes easy to implement a solution, or the pathway for what is needed to overcome the problem becomes more obvious.
P – Plan, Prepare & Teach This is what you typically might come across when seeking support for an Autistic child. This is where strategies are taught to help the child learn new skills, prepare for upcoming situations, or reflect on a past challenge to learn from. However, at this point in the framework, you will have understood both your contribution to the current challenge and why it makes sense that the problem exists for your child. This part of the SUPER Framework is where you may implement things like visual schedules or social stories to help them anticipate what’s coming next or consider step-by-step instructions for working on a new skill. Preparing the child—and yourself—for potential challenges makes overwhelming situations more manageable.
This might also mean preparing for sensory needs. If you know a child becomes overstimulated in crowded spaces, consider noise-canceling headphones or planning quiet breaks during outings.
E - Environment & Culture This is where the social model of disability kicks in where we look at how the environment can be changed instead of making the child change to the environment. Is the space sensory-friendly? Are there quiet areas for regulation? Creating an environment that minimizes sensory overwhelm and promotes comfort can help the child feel safe and supported.
Think about lighting, noise levels, and seating arrangements. Small changes, like dimmer lights or access to fidget tools, can transform an overwhelming space into a welcoming one. Flexibility is key—what works for one child may not work for another.
Culture is part of the child’s environment too. What is the culture of your family or classroom? Is it neuro-affirming? Does it teach the child they are liked, loved and a valuable contributor? Do they feel included, and comfortable to be themselves where they don’t need to mask their quirks and differences? Are they receiving messages that celebrate uniqueness and diversity and that they are worthy individuals who are appreciated?
R – Relationships & Rapport At the heart of the SUPER framework are relationships. Building trust and connection is essential for supporting Autistic children. Listen to their needs, validate their feelings, and work collaboratively to find solutions. A strong relationship can be the foundation for growth and resilience.
Relationships are built over time through consistent, positive interactions. Be mindful to connect with the child over fun and trivial things and don’t just let your relationship be about guiding, teaching, correcting or fixing problems. Celebrate the child’s achievements, no matter how small, and always approach challenges with empathy. When a child feels understood and supported, they’re more likely to thrive and you build up relationship capital (trust) so that when things get challenging, you will be seen as a pillar of support, or the relationship can quickly recover if ruptured.
By using the SUPER framework, you can create a supportive, neuro-affirming environment that celebrates the child’s strengths while addressing their unique needs. Our Autism Parenting Training is built around using this Super Framework in many different areas of supporting an Autistic child including, meltdowns, shutdowns, Anxiety, school avoidance, PDA, masking and more.